The scenic South

GREYMOUTH, SOUTH ISLAND - 22nd January 2010

I've come to the conclusion that the South Island is far, far too scenic for its own good. The interislander ferry approaches Picton, its South Island terminus, by cruising up through sections of the Marlborough Sounds, including the wonderful Queen Charlotte Sound that surrounds the port. Everyone with a camera is clicking away as if there's no tomorrow - it is stunning - but what you soon realise once you're in your car and driving is that stunning scenery is just a given here.

Having dropped off my Hyundai Accent in Wellington I picked up a new car in Picton - a much newer, but in every other way much worse, Daihatsu Sirion. Without wanting to launch into a Jeremy Clarkson-esque car review, driving the Daihatsu made you realise why no one in their right mind buys the cars. It purportedly has a 1.3L engine, but instead of producing torque it produces a shrilling loud whirr and about 2 and a half horse power. My 998cc VW Polo sitting in our drive back home would blow this thing out the water in a drag race, and that's not even mentioning the handling. I can guarantee there won't be any repeats of North Island's speeding tickets down here, cos I have absolutely no faith in this car to make it round any corner at a speed faster than 80km/h. The understeer borders on criminal, but correcting it requires you to slow down to such an extent that the stupid thing doesn't have enough power to accelerate again on the other side of the bend. In really is a hunk of junk.

Funnily enough, the handling actually improved after I picked up a group of 3 hitch-hiking backpackers along the Queen Charlotte Scenic Drive between Picton and Nelson - my destination for the night. Presumably the extra weight helped distribute its hopeless balance differential, but the flipside was that the already pathetic acceleration became just that bit worse. Nevertheless, it was good to have some company again - this motley crew consisted of two British lads and a Danish girl, who provided some entertaining if inane chat along the way - certainly far more than any of the hitch-hikers I'd offered rides to up in North Island.

The rain that had punctuated our drive cleared as we approached Nelson, and after dropping off the passengers I enjoyed a nice evening checking out the seaside towns parks and Art Deco cathedral (they changed their mind about the design half way through building a classical structure), including a climb to what claims to be the "Geographical Centre of New Zealand". How they've calculated it is anyone's guess, but it seemed slightly more than co-incidental that the point would happen to be exactly at the top of the highest hill in the town. Still, it was a good walk that worked up an excellent appetite for another of the "101 Must-Dos for Kiwis" - sampling the cuisine of Seafood City. Never one to miss out on a good meal, particularly of the seafood variety, I scouted out the "Best in Town" seafood chowder from the Victorian Rose, which went down beautifully with a pint of the local ale and a live duet cracking out some chillout tunes of the Damien Rice/Jason Mraz/Coldplay variety.

A good night's sleep was, frankly, well deserved, and it was up and out sharp this morning for the long drive westward to the coastal city of Greymouth. As luck would have it, the touring bus had failed to pick up a girl who'd been staying in my hostel (Accents on the Park), and she was supposed to be heading down to Greymouth, so in a flash I had a travel companion and halved petrol costs. Turns out Rina was - like me - a second generation Indian, but born and brought up in Reading and now working as a pharmacist, having graduated from Bath Uni. Our journey included a stop at the Pancake Rocks at Punakaiki. In a world where scientists have an explanation for basically everything, it is refreshing to see a geological formation whose creation, to this day, has no good explanation. But sure enough, they do look like stacks of pancakes (see right)!

By about 2pm we'd reached Greymouth, and I was able to spend a few hours kotching at the excellent Neptune's Backpackers, chatting to Chris the Croydon lad running the show for the evening. A trip to the tourist info centre saw me book a big exciting adventure for tomorrow (involving glaciers, helicopters and crampons), and Rina had covered petrol costs by booking the both of us on the evening's tour of Monteith's Brewery - the pride of Greymouth and (according to Chris) "the only thing to do in the town". The tour included tastings (with free top ups) of all 6 of the beers produced as well as their new crushed apple cider, and even threw in an excellent dinner at one of the local pubs.

All that's left is an evening film back at Neptune's...